Wednesday, March 5, 2014
Eclipse and Reconnect
Definition of "Eclipse" :
(of a celestial body) obscure the light from or to (another celestial body).
Good Morning Bloggers,
Welcome to a new Day. Each day is precious. When my eyes open, I feel thankful.
When an Eclipse occurs, Celestial bodies are obscured from view of others. It's the epitome of "walking through the darkness or the moonlight". When things (when truth) is obscured, feelings may not be real, and life feels heavy. Eclipses are phases and they are real. When an eclipse occurs, we walk like semi-blind people through a fog of light and emotion. We feel separated from our Source (God) or our Spirit...or our Light. But the Truth is that although our eyes cannot see the other Celestial Bodies or the Light, it is actually still there. Our feelings and beliefs of separation are the only truth known to us at that time. But if we seek a deeper connection to our Source and to Light, we can be Certain and Confident that we are always connected. We can KNOW with Certainty. This is how we can then reconnect.
So why do it?
Why should you reconnect to your Light when you find yourself in this dark eclipse period of life? I have chosen to write about this as we have eclipses coming...real actual eclipses. And much like my philosophical picture above, you WILL feel as though you are walking through the darkness disconnected from your Light. If you do not know who or what to believe in, you may suffer as you wander through the dimness of the eclipse period. For this reason, I encourage you to dig deep and persevere this.
This is my Love Blog, so of course, this connects to the theme of romantic love.
For me, Love has proven itself to be this passionate, unpredictable journey. I have always felt the presence of Love near me...of someone near me. Then one day I just "had" the understanding of the meaning of 11:11. I had the knowledge of the Twin Flame connection. It occurred to me as a flash, and instant of knowing. It struck me so instantly and intensely. There was a flash of light and then the thoughts and information were just "there" in my mind. It was as if they were instantly "downloaded" into my mind. I stood there completely dumbfounded. For a while I remained somewhat perplexed because I thought that I was supposed to be connected with a person I knew then...because they were there.
As my understanding of Twin Flames (TF) expanded, I grew in my wisdom - and the knowledge came to exist in my heart. The feelings and the extra sensory understanding also evolved. My evolution in this way has always been guiding me. Through many eclipses, I have persevered and continued to grow in this knowledge and understanding. So here I stand, March 2014. Eclipse season beginning for the year...very soon. It will be dark times for many. But once through it, the Light will shine brighter-brightest!
How do I know?
Before my evolution and awakening about this began, prior to 2012, I could still track my experiences. They began in childhood. My "knowing" things...my stumbling around in darkness, and most importantly, my being completely deceived by false people and false situations-situations that resembled what was coming for me that was good, but while NOT being the True calling or the True ONE person I was supposed to be with on the ONE path. How do I know there is one? I just know. The funny thing is we find many on the path to the one and this too is pre-ordained. I believe people can love more than one person at a time. I believe they can have a variety of experiences that have good and bad in them. I know for a fact that when you are with the right one, your life changes in tremendous ways. I also believe that everything is predestined.
It started when I was around 9 or 10 years old. There was an incident that I would call a childhood trauma and then what followed was the birth of my emotional esp about this "other part of me" who was separated from me and was always there...sort of like an imaginary friend. I didn't actually think this person was there...it was more of a knowing that they were going to be someday and that they were already out there somewhere living their life and getting ready for me. I did not know how or when I would find them and we would be brought together. The other thing was that I would talk to this "other person" and share my hopes and dreams with them. When I look back upon those memories and consider my innocence at the time, I can more easily recognize certain very important, vital and crucial elements- like for example, how the "relationship felt" or the tenderness of the words we shared. I can still recall in vivid detail those type of things and they are the thoughts that have emerged recently from my deep consciousness up to my lucid awareness. This all began happening because I started to feel these things again...newly...with another person. It is so beautiful. Reconnecting with The One...your true Path...That would depend upon spiritual preparedness and readiness. That can take a lifetime. Some people will never achieve it.
Our love, here on the planet...our Group consciousness...is in need of major lifting. I happen to feel strongly that Lovers who come together to serve a greater purpose on this planet and unite humanity, are applauded by the angels. I feel that our coming together is also divinely created and serves to offer us hope, as we can then offer hope to others- to many others! I want that kind of calling.
Don't you?
~Love others and BE BLESSED~
Lilac
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
Why fall in Love?
Good morning Bloggers.
My heart has been heavy. Love (my love life)- has truly let me down and left me disappointed.
I always have opportunities for love. I am charming and outgoing. I am also a very devoted partner....devoted to a fault. When I fall in Love, I fall hard. I don't fall fast, but I do fall hard.
Lilac here- AngelMarie- I have allowed many things to exist in my love experience and they have caused me to have a broken vision for what it feels like to be truly loved or in love. What we allow, and what we stop show people what our boundaries are. Boundaries are important. Just feeling love for someone, is NOT enough... And there is one other thing to know about creating a life with a man or a partner. You must have a common vision for your life, or no amount of loving each other will keep it together.
I always think of Dolly Parton. She is dynamically outgoing. Her husband is a quiet, reclusive type of man. You never see them out and about together. They must have love...they have been together so long! Dolly never lets things prevent her from creating new opportunities or delving into new experiences or even from being in the spotlight! But the fact that her husband is never there has always disturbed me.
This disturbs me because it pokes at my value system. I envision this comraderie...this dynamic duo. That is the kind of husband I would want to have...if I ever were to be married.
I thought I found that recently. But years of being together have shown me how painfully slowly developments can and will (or will not) happen if only one person wants them and the other is afraid to move or to act.
I need to talk about this. I know talking about this could cause to hurt the man I Love, but I need to talk about it. Writing this Blog...writing these things (about these topics), was the one thing that truly made me happy.
He also needs to talk about it. No one wants to be a spectacle, but we all experience similar situations and I for one have had to set up certain safety nets for me because of having previously been in so many abusive/neglectful relationships, starting as a child. So I KNOW, with certainty- that I cannot simply isolate myself and figure out my own problems and experiences. I need my own inner wisdom as a guide, yes...that I do... and I use it. But I need my extended community of friends and family.
I moved in with my boyfriend in November 2012, so a year and 3 months ago. We had been a couple for about 3 months (physically), but had been developing the relationship consistently for several months prior via email/text/phone and Skype. We knew each other and had a foundation. Years ago we had laid that foundation too and life tore us apart from each other then. We found that a second chance would come to us.
I believed this man was my Twin Flame and my perfect partner, and so I knew with no doubt in my mind whatsoever, that we would work out any and all challenges together. I had a vision of us teaching and guiding friends and new people in our lives...helping them find success on their paths through friendship and through sharing kabbalistic teachings. We were able to touch a few people. In time, it all faded. People in my world felt my Partner was overbearing and demanding. They felt he talked at them and not with them. My kids had the same complaint. He had started out fun but had become something else. He and I bickered over nearly every decision we needed to make for the home and family.
I was experiencing the same feelings of being "spoken at" or controlled or told how to do something...even told that my way of thinking of things was not the right or best way. I felt I had to obey and follow directions. I spent much of my time in denial about what I could see already as a controlling partner. He has such a big gentle heart, that I knew without a doubt it was me bringing this ugly side out of him. I must be overbearing and controlling and he is fighting back!
How could I be wrong about him or about us? I KNOW what I felt...what I feel...what I KNOW to be true! How can I be wrong?
I would spend many more days, nights...weekends of fights...weeks of coldness in the house and around my kids. What was I teaching them now? We had gone from being the couple who were going to show others "The Way"...to being the couple who were not on the marriage track. That was taken off the table early on by my partner. We were not on the "having another baby" track. That was also taken off the table by my partner. We were not managing our money or our physical living environment in a way that produced good results for us to function better. But worst of all...we had become a terrible example for my children. This was not what I had wanted or expected.
My boyfriend loves me in his own way and he will never voluntarily give me up. He will stay and suffer until the end of his life for me. But I cannot do that....which leaves me asking the question, "do I not love people enough?" . I mean...if I am not willing to look at all the bad things and still stay and be loving and give more and try more...am I lacking in love? What does this say about who I am and what kind of heart I have? I feel broken everywhere inside of me. My mind feels tired and confused. My heart is aching for my loss...my lost love. And my soul has gone into Hermit phase...wandering the fields and valleys and hillsides searching for inspiration. I need my soul to come back to my body and stay with me and guide me. I need my Angels to pour merciful energy on me and lift my legs and feet...make me move again. I feel myself dying and I have to keep pulling life back into me.
Is this what a broken heart feels like?
~Lilac
My heart has been heavy. Love (my love life)- has truly let me down and left me disappointed.
I always have opportunities for love. I am charming and outgoing. I am also a very devoted partner....devoted to a fault. When I fall in Love, I fall hard. I don't fall fast, but I do fall hard.
Lilac here- AngelMarie- I have allowed many things to exist in my love experience and they have caused me to have a broken vision for what it feels like to be truly loved or in love. What we allow, and what we stop show people what our boundaries are. Boundaries are important. Just feeling love for someone, is NOT enough... And there is one other thing to know about creating a life with a man or a partner. You must have a common vision for your life, or no amount of loving each other will keep it together.
I always think of Dolly Parton. She is dynamically outgoing. Her husband is a quiet, reclusive type of man. You never see them out and about together. They must have love...they have been together so long! Dolly never lets things prevent her from creating new opportunities or delving into new experiences or even from being in the spotlight! But the fact that her husband is never there has always disturbed me.
This disturbs me because it pokes at my value system. I envision this comraderie...this dynamic duo. That is the kind of husband I would want to have...if I ever were to be married.
I thought I found that recently. But years of being together have shown me how painfully slowly developments can and will (or will not) happen if only one person wants them and the other is afraid to move or to act.
I need to talk about this. I know talking about this could cause to hurt the man I Love, but I need to talk about it. Writing this Blog...writing these things (about these topics), was the one thing that truly made me happy.
He also needs to talk about it. No one wants to be a spectacle, but we all experience similar situations and I for one have had to set up certain safety nets for me because of having previously been in so many abusive/neglectful relationships, starting as a child. So I KNOW, with certainty- that I cannot simply isolate myself and figure out my own problems and experiences. I need my own inner wisdom as a guide, yes...that I do... and I use it. But I need my extended community of friends and family.
I moved in with my boyfriend in November 2012, so a year and 3 months ago. We had been a couple for about 3 months (physically), but had been developing the relationship consistently for several months prior via email/text/phone and Skype. We knew each other and had a foundation. Years ago we had laid that foundation too and life tore us apart from each other then. We found that a second chance would come to us.
I believed this man was my Twin Flame and my perfect partner, and so I knew with no doubt in my mind whatsoever, that we would work out any and all challenges together. I had a vision of us teaching and guiding friends and new people in our lives...helping them find success on their paths through friendship and through sharing kabbalistic teachings. We were able to touch a few people. In time, it all faded. People in my world felt my Partner was overbearing and demanding. They felt he talked at them and not with them. My kids had the same complaint. He had started out fun but had become something else. He and I bickered over nearly every decision we needed to make for the home and family.
I was experiencing the same feelings of being "spoken at" or controlled or told how to do something...even told that my way of thinking of things was not the right or best way. I felt I had to obey and follow directions. I spent much of my time in denial about what I could see already as a controlling partner. He has such a big gentle heart, that I knew without a doubt it was me bringing this ugly side out of him. I must be overbearing and controlling and he is fighting back!
How could I be wrong about him or about us? I KNOW what I felt...what I feel...what I KNOW to be true! How can I be wrong?
I would spend many more days, nights...weekends of fights...weeks of coldness in the house and around my kids. What was I teaching them now? We had gone from being the couple who were going to show others "The Way"...to being the couple who were not on the marriage track. That was taken off the table early on by my partner. We were not on the "having another baby" track. That was also taken off the table by my partner. We were not managing our money or our physical living environment in a way that produced good results for us to function better. But worst of all...we had become a terrible example for my children. This was not what I had wanted or expected.
My boyfriend loves me in his own way and he will never voluntarily give me up. He will stay and suffer until the end of his life for me. But I cannot do that....which leaves me asking the question, "do I not love people enough?" . I mean...if I am not willing to look at all the bad things and still stay and be loving and give more and try more...am I lacking in love? What does this say about who I am and what kind of heart I have? I feel broken everywhere inside of me. My mind feels tired and confused. My heart is aching for my loss...my lost love. And my soul has gone into Hermit phase...wandering the fields and valleys and hillsides searching for inspiration. I need my soul to come back to my body and stay with me and guide me. I need my Angels to pour merciful energy on me and lift my legs and feet...make me move again. I feel myself dying and I have to keep pulling life back into me.
Is this what a broken heart feels like?
~Lilac
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Welcome to my new Blog
Ahhhhh the smell of a fresh new Blog Page! Is there anything better than that?
I recently began asking myself those old philosophical questions...those existential ones. Then it occurred to me that life is more simple than we sometimes make it. Even though it is simple, it is complicated too. We need to strike that balance in how we manage it. How do we deepen our life but not over-burden ourselves with unnecessary worry?
I like to think that we are here for a purpose...there is a reason. I believe it's true. I know we are here to create a great life for ourselves and participate with others in a community. Everything else...well, all that is fluff to me. Whatever I color that page with, it's extra.
I believe in Kabbalah for my foundation in life. Kabbalah has taught me to look to other religions and philosophies in a way that no other religious experience ever did for me. Christianity never taught me that I should read books written by the Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh. Actually, it was my obstetrician who told me! How did he come to share that with me? LOVE That simple. Love makes everything happen. He loves me because I am his fellow human being and sharing it with me was going to make my life better.
I read "The Art of Happiness" by his holiness the Dalai Lama. My Christian family probably would agree that the teachings are sound and if followed, will lead us to greater happiness and success. Also, others around us can be lead to greater happiness as well. But Happiness is not seen by most people as the foundation upon which success is built.
Happiness springs from Love
Loving what you do...who you are...feeling the feelings of love.
The elevation that comes from Love...that is what we should be seeking. NOT the high from feeling loved, but rather the elevation of spirit that comes from feeling real love for ourselves and others.
My new blog is dedicated to my community. My friends and family have created the stories and live them out each day. I want to be their story teller and so I will. We learn to understand life by listening to the lives of others. We experience and share more kindness when we break down walls. Those walls are trying to make us believe we are separated from other people. Actually, that is not true at all. We are all connected.
Thank you for reading and visiting this blog. Now allow me to inspire you with each visit as you enrich my experience of writing, by reading.
~Lilac
I recently began asking myself those old philosophical questions...those existential ones. Then it occurred to me that life is more simple than we sometimes make it. Even though it is simple, it is complicated too. We need to strike that balance in how we manage it. How do we deepen our life but not over-burden ourselves with unnecessary worry?
I like to think that we are here for a purpose...there is a reason. I believe it's true. I know we are here to create a great life for ourselves and participate with others in a community. Everything else...well, all that is fluff to me. Whatever I color that page with, it's extra.
I believe in Kabbalah for my foundation in life. Kabbalah has taught me to look to other religions and philosophies in a way that no other religious experience ever did for me. Christianity never taught me that I should read books written by the Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh. Actually, it was my obstetrician who told me! How did he come to share that with me? LOVE That simple. Love makes everything happen. He loves me because I am his fellow human being and sharing it with me was going to make my life better.
I read "The Art of Happiness" by his holiness the Dalai Lama. My Christian family probably would agree that the teachings are sound and if followed, will lead us to greater happiness and success. Also, others around us can be lead to greater happiness as well. But Happiness is not seen by most people as the foundation upon which success is built.
Happiness springs from Love
Loving what you do...who you are...feeling the feelings of love.
The elevation that comes from Love...that is what we should be seeking. NOT the high from feeling loved, but rather the elevation of spirit that comes from feeling real love for ourselves and others.
My new blog is dedicated to my community. My friends and family have created the stories and live them out each day. I want to be their story teller and so I will. We learn to understand life by listening to the lives of others. We experience and share more kindness when we break down walls. Those walls are trying to make us believe we are separated from other people. Actually, that is not true at all. We are all connected.
Thank you for reading and visiting this blog. Now allow me to inspire you with each visit as you enrich my experience of writing, by reading.
~Lilac
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